Although you might think you have to be very experimental to experience the sexual thrills described in the Novel “50 Shades of Grey” you’ll find that just a few sex toys will set you up nicely for the sort of bedroom fun that reading the book has got sex toy newbies eager to discover.
Girls this is about empowerment too. You don’t have to be submissive to enjoy sex toys, sexuality is about being yourself and enjoying your body. But doesn’t that mean your partner will feel threatened by your new-found love of sex toys and adult novelties? Of course not, there are very few men out there who will not enjoy the sight of their partner pleasuring themselves, or indeed helping their partner to pleasure themselves with a vibrator or dildo.
For those not quite ready for the BDSM elements of the book themselves here are the basics.
Dildos
If you want to have a little manual fun, no batteries required then get yourself a dildo. As with all sex toy choices the size and style of dildo should be your choice because you have to feel utterly relaxed and at home with a sex toy to enjoy it completely.
As a first sex toy a realistic penis shaped product might be what you choose. It’s familiar, is available in all sorts of sizes and many different materials. However a realistic dildo is designed to mimic the real thing no matter how large or small it is moulded and that isn’t necessarily the best thing for you. The penis was developed by nature for a number of different purposes, whereas a dildo can be fashioned from materials and shaped in such a way that its design has only one aim – purely to pleasure you.
A designer vibrator in the most modern medical grade silicone can often be far more effective at reaching a woman’s pleasure zones so if you want to get straight to the fun you might want to choose one of these. For some men who do feel a little nervous about you using a sex toy the more stylised shape and often totally un-flesh-like colour of these sex toys means they are less likely to compare them with their own, erm, equipment.
Whatever vibrator you choose, cheap, gaudy and fun or beautifully designed, crafted and fulfilling you should start by reading our dildo reviews to buy the right dildo for you.
Vibrators
Vibrators can be used internally within the vagina or externally on the clitoris, or even both at the same time in the case of rabbit vibrators.
Everything we’ve said about dildos applies to vibrators and then of course there’s the buzzing …
Each model of vibrator has a different power, frequency and more often than not number of vibrating patterns. Some need batteries to provide their power whereas others are rechargeable with their energy cells sealed inside. This makes the rechargeable vibrators more likely to be waterproof than other models (though this isn’t always the case) and being able to use the vibrator when wet opens up many possibilities for you and your partner.
A recent and often very useful feature of more expensive vibrators is remote control. This can be handed to your partner so they control your experience or simply used by you to make finding the perfect stimulation so much easier than reaching between your legs to find the control buttons.
Butt Plugs and other Anal Sex Toys
Butt plugs have been around for a long time and come in a range of sizes and materials just like other sex toys. The important thing to remember when using a sex toy for anal play is that you choose one specifically designed for the job. Don’t use anything on your ass that might slip inside – the ring of muscles around your anal sphincter is very strong and can cause a sex toy to slip inside without warning. This is why all anal sex toys, butt plugs included have a collar or base that stops the toy disappearing into your rectum when you least expect it.
More so than any other toy you should start with a toy that will comfortably fit in your ass. Anal play can be very pleasurable due to the immense number of nerve endings around the entrance to your rectum. This sensitivity means that if you are too ambitious in your choice of anal sex toy you risk crossing the line from pleasure to pain spoiling your anal play.
Ben Wa Balls, Love Eggs and Your Kegel Muscles
A toy that does feature in the “50 Shades” books and has generated a lot of interest amongst women is Ben Wa Balls or “Love eggs”. Designs vary from the original pair of metal balls connected by a chord to ones made in ceramics and even silicone. They are also multi-purpose in that as well as aiming to stimulate a woman sexually the wearer can exercise their Kegel Muscles which can help prevent bladder weakness and increase the pleasure of sex for both partners by developing control of a woman’s vagina.
We can’t guarantee you’ll orgasm as soon as you slip them in but you never know!
Then of course there are the BDSM toys … but that’s for another article.